i'm abit hurt. you kinda only realised it now. and besides. you probably don't give a damn. you'd probably be better off without me and that's fine. i guess i've just lost it, cause you and a couple of others used to be the people i hung with. and now that's gone, i'm pretty lonely. try. just try. oh, i forgot. you've got wayy too many people to hang out with. too many choices. oh, can't choose! sorry, i ain't like you. so i know that isn't supposed to be the main motive of me going. i'm even embarrassed to say going where. i shall keep it to myself. just so. but know that i've lost it. and i need to get it back. and you moving off isn't helping much. i was just thinking about how much of a... nevermind. you probably are when you decided to talk to me. fine. oh, so you're moving even further. fine. i know it's prolly not cause you're moving away from me. you're probably too busy to even remember me. you ask why you haven't seen me in how long? but when you see me you don't bother, even though i was alone and waiting. i'm not desperate for you to hang with me. i'm just a little hurt (ok maybe more than a little) you're really the person i've always prevented myself from thinking you were. so much for knowing you for close to a decade. i guess people change. and my intuition's right most of the time. you meet, and then you forget the people who aren't cool enough for you. imo. correct me if i'm wrong but that's how i see it. and so much for wishing me happy birthday yeah? lenny got a wayy more excited happy birthday from you, thanks. i know i'm such a jealous bitch but i can't help it. i can't go blaming my whole walking away on you. i know it isn't fair. but it's part of the problem. i'm sorry.
hello goodbye; 11:30 PM
Saturday, August 27, 2011
RYAN HIGA :D
lol lol ryan higa. though he kinda makes sense heeee
oh and this. the story line's totally b-grade. but. aww (: totally made me smile.
hello goodbye; 4:11 PM
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Look back and see how far you've come
it's been so long since i last posted. nearly five days? but it's been busybusy for me with a trip to USS on sunday, chem SPA yesterday and a physics and chem test coming up this week. oh plus eom due tomorrow. infact, i shouldn't even be blogging/doing whatever i'm doing right now. but who cares right. I was just watching some old videos. of my favourite kids, as usual. some of which i've watched before and some which i haven't. i guess you could saw that a number of these videos can be said to mark milestones in my life haha. as weird as that sounds. the biggest bit was the period before and during Os, when everything. and i mean everything. seemed to be going wrong for me. life was really a pain at that period and u remember watching so many of these videos, i can't even remember how i found time to study. but i guess i did anyways. (kinda feeling the same way now since i have a physics test tomorrow and i'm unprepared hahah) but i know that that period was emotionally draining and i found solace in stuff like that. i know i'm not supposed to find solace in these things luh. i'm supposed to seek God and all. but it was so painful and these kids made me laugh. made my day, even. now i sound like a no-lifer/sad-lifer hahaha. but that's the way it was then. but i guess God works for good and i eventually get there, but there are some things in life just worth looking back on, smiling at the good times (and at my favs (: ) and cringing or moping or regretting about the bad. the things you didn't make happen. the things you wanted to do but never got round to doing it. whether it was cause you didn't have the guts to, or you just didn't know how to go about doing it. the bad. the things you lost. the people you lost. the trust you lost. loads of stuff. but it's kinda dandy now. just that at times life brings me to nowhere. a dead end. it confuses you. your emotions aren't what you want them to be. and i look back trying to find the times when life was more exciting, at least. and end up digging up alot of junk. but i guess this junk's good. maybe i'll learn from it. but for most part, i just regret and do nothing. i guess it's back to videos for solace for awhile.
i can't believe Gee is such an old song. 2009. that makes it. two to three years old. and it seemed like just yesterday when i watched this video. hi jay. i see you're still with 2pm (:
jokes. all of them.
oh and jungminnie totally owned with this one. so much better than all the other double-s appearances on the past years' dance battles. hee. trust him to come up with a good one.
i'd much rather prefer beast's style. mblaq's seemed wayy to cheap. especially the shirt ripping bit. though their techniques is admittedly better. ah wells. but imo, dance battle's having less quality dance as the years pass. in fact. just in 2010 suju vs 2pm was way better. talk about looking back and realising your past glory heh.
gotta be one of my favourite kpop world dance battles of all time. way talented. better than beast and mblaq. definite.
and what more can i say but, perfect? what more with leeteuk's mega hair flick, which totally made my day. (:
hello goodbye; 5:19 PM
Friday, August 19, 2011
sorry for party rocking
while i'm online now. and since people already started wishing me happy birthday, i thought i'd just get a head start in thanking all those who've wished me so far. this is for you (: videos by hok from the quest crew. gosh he's cool. hee
hello goodbye; 12:40 AM
Thursday, August 18, 2011
a life of missed opportunities
this isn't the first time it's happening. twice in two years. missing my favourite kpop group's performance and now, missing the 3D concert movie version thingum. D: They're gonna show super show 3 in the cinemas and i won't be able to catch it again. what's new? it's so close to promos and costs 30 bucks for a ticket, a steal compared to the real concert, definitely. but then again, the whole atmosphere can't compare. thing is, i can't go. which. omg fml. i know this is really trivial and all, but it really hurts everytime i miss seeing something/someone i've grown so attached to. and it's not just superficial and silly stuff like kpop. people who i haven't seen in ages, as wells as familiar things that i've just grown accustomed to. i've been lucky enough to meetup with mon and my lovelies recently, but there are still people i absolutely miss. it hurts how i can't bring myself to meet them. oh well
hello goodbye; 9:32 PM
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
another bit of magic
MR performance. SJ jjang
hello goodbye; 6:19 PM
nowhere
2pm gives me the impression of being really busy as of late! another MV from their foray into the japanese market. uh. the hottest were raving about how sexy the tie dance was.. but i think all the false stripping and all makes it seem really cheap. don't ask me why. it just seems. weird and desperate haha. i only bothered watching both versions of the MV because of junsu. gosh. is he such a dear or what. the bad thing is, everytime i see junsu, i think of you ):
where did the self control go
hello goodbye; 6:02 PM
Sunday, August 14, 2011
talent
kim yuna's performance really leaves me breathless hee. i don't really know what this program is about, but it seems like an iceskating competition! cool stuff (: i shall watch all the kiss&cry performances when i'm a little free-er. a little spot of kpop fandom over here. some of my favourtie stars turned up to support kim yuna! choikang changmin, jun k/key (haha it wasn't very clear..). choi minho and some others who i really can't tell who's who.
i was watching immortal song yesterday too. i'm usually not into the whole vocals thing. but it's pretty good, because kpop idol group vocalists finally get the chance to fully show off their vocal power. hmm. i'd say yesung's was really really good.
not my favourite sj member but definitely one of the best vocalists in the idol world. after the likes of hongki, of course. jjong was pretty good too. OH OH and jay *squeals* hehe. but stuff here's all serious good. and it's another thing i have to watch when i'm, well, free-er. :/
meanwhile. hehe party rock turned british. lol much (:
hello goodbye; 10:09 PM
Saturday, August 13, 2011
hold it in
eunhyuk's such a man. hee. i bet if it were anyone else, that person would have lost his head a long time ago. though this kinda makes me think of the kind of person i'd wanna be if someone else attacked my friends. not in such a violent manner, of course. but maybe in a verbal sense? if some one bitches about my friends, do i take it lying down or do i attack the person? or do i just play mediator. like hyuk. hmm.
this is part of the reason i love super junior. they're mostly good kids (:
and really. sm needs to show off their individual talents more. heechuls voice is really undermined most of the time ): only because of KRY's existence. oh well.
hello goodbye; 3:25 PM
Friday, August 12, 2011
because. just because
because i know the true you isn't who you are now
because i know you're still the same old kid
because i believe that you have the will power to change
because i fervently pray for your return
because i still love you, despite the mistakes you've made
because i believe it's never to late to turn back
because i claim God's work in your life
because i trust that He will give you the strength, where ever you are
because no matter how far away you seem to be, know that you're always close. in my heart
because seventeenth won't just be the day between birthdays for me
because twelfth will hold a world full of promise and new beginnings
because i still believe in you after all this while
because there're some things that will never change
because you will return. as good as new
because. just because.
hello goodbye; 9:24 PM
Thursday, August 11, 2011
We boys don’t get butterflies, we get fireworks. We don’t have you on our mind 24/7, but we do have you on our hearts. Often, yes we wait for you to go online, sometimes simply even just being online makes our heart skip a beat, even if we don’t talk. Whenever you talk to us, our face forms that half-smile; it means we are happy but are trying our hardest to not show it, and fail at hiding it. We do miss you all the time; granted, we’d spend all our time with you if possible. We don’t think of the smallest things you say, we think of every word you say, panicking at every single word, trying to define what it really means, to read between the lines.
We would love you in a million ways. And once we start loving you there is no going back for us. No matter how hard we try we will always love a girl that has touched us. Us boys when in love will think of that girl first thing in the morning, and think of that girl last before we sleep at night. Whenever we see a couple, our thoughts immediately jump to that girl, and imagine that the couple was us. Every single detail about her is loved; the way she walks, talks, speaks. The sound of her voice. Her laughter. The sparkle in her eyes. Her shy smile. The way she dresses. That cute face she makes when she’s asleep. And the way she says our name that our hearts just explode with mirth, a simple act that no-one else can replicate.
A boy in love with a girl is no simple thing, though ladies stereotype us guys as simple. A man in love is not simple. No. He will be unpredictable. He will be persistent, stubborn, and given the circumstances, if it means carrying you from one side of the world to the other to win your heart, a man in love would. He will be a martyr, giving his all and asking for almost none. He will show you how to appreciate the beauty of the world in a thousand ways, and then he will tell you how much he appreciates your beauty in a million ways.
A man in love is no simple thing.
read this off a blog. it's the sweetest thing ever. now. if only..
hello goodbye; 6:50 PM
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
again
NDP this year seemed to be on a tight budget. what with the somewhat lack of a fly past ): i missed the performance segment cause i figured it'd be boring but it turns out not. haha. apparently it had a story line this year! i love stories! heee
national day celebration in nj yesterday was a little. dead. as in nobody there's enthusiastic enough to sing-along and all ): you have to sing along on national day! and dance to reach out for the stars and sing what do you see and home really really loudly! isn't that where all the fun is! so anyways. abigail and I were the only idiots dancing to reach out for the stars. but it was fun (: but all the fun came later! as usual, the two of us strayed from the normal. we figured that we'd climb a couple of walls/railings, cross a deep drop and climb another wall to get back to class instead of going up the stairs. don't stairs just bore you with their angular shapes? haha. so anyway. we decided to take the interesting route up to class. i admit, it was a teeny bit dangerous. but when you're young, you just wanna have fun. we were about to climb the last wall when one of the PE teachers caught us ): we were almost done with our little adventure!! couldn't he have let us finish the last bit! he was strict but pretty nice about it. didn't ask for our names, so we're safe for now (: hee. Class outing from then on! It was my first time going to sentosa in like, more than a decade? haha and the water works thingum which i have a photo of when i was six was still there. looks like some things just don't change. but the odd thing is, that's my only memory of the place. :/ we hit the beach after lunch at vivo. oh oh. right. yujie and i went on a mini shopping spree at vivo. we bagged 2 topshop underwear (it's for someone's birthday present! (: SPECIAL) and a zara tee in less than half an hour. gosh. i bet if you gave the two of us an unlimited sum of money and very little time, we'd probably be able to get loads of stuff. i realised that yujie's one of the guys you can really shop with ahaha. one day. yujie, abigail and i shall go shopping together! :D yepps back to sentosa. it was such a coincidence! i saw not just one person, but a whole bunch of people i knew! bern, tamago and belle haha totally surprised to see them. then i saw alison kuah from a distance. it was probably her. couldn't really see clearly, but since the people she was with were tj kids, i'm probably right. and omg yes. saw a couple of hot butches. abigail's friend is so hot. omg. haha now i sound les. :/ no worries though. i'm still very much straight! but ah omg. i bet bee chan would've been so excited.
after much argument with my parents, i managed to meet up with my lovely mates today too! joee, hengxuan, chi, lijing, cyn, michelle, joyce and I met for lunch before joee left for the US. i think we should make this an annual ritual: sakae sushi buffet on a public holiday at icon village. considering that lijing, joee, cyn and i went there around this time last year too! it was really good to talk to everyone again. especially lijing. yeps. i guess there are things that are just hard to destroy even if you wanted to. even if i get grounded for the next tw outings i plan as a result of meeting you guys, i'd still choose to meet you. cause you guys are some of the most important people to me in this world. (: and i don't feel so bad after meeting you guys cause we realise how much we actually miss each other and how school's never the same. nobody seems to be enjoying jc life very much anyway, so i'm not alone.
love you all so much. now i don't wanna go back to school ):
hello goodbye; 12:39 AM
Saturday, August 6, 2011
the last man standing
perfectly delivered lines! super junior, you're unbelievable (: even non-singers like leeteuk and eunhyuk sang on pitch and everything was so perfect, i have nothing to say. i can't believe that teuk and heechul will have to enlist in the army after this album is done. my world's gonna crumble ):
meanwhile, i'm still pretty in love with this song! it's better than the other songs missA had released previously.
had to take part in this current affairs quiz yesterday as part of speak good english week! laurene dragged me into it :/ but i guess i'm still pretty good! we could answer all the other group's questions except for our own and i'm really pissed how i studied geography and didn't know that acute hunger was most common in asia, and not africa. mrs chan wouldn't be very proud of me ): so we lost in the second round. but it's not fair! oh, i found i really amusing that i actually know more about sports than the guys in nj. seriously. they all need to get a life. one group was asked something about the team to which fernando torres' transfer made him the world's fourth most expensive player (the group eventually got the question right) and this guy seated behind me went "to ac milan" and i was like WHAT! NO! he was so confident okk! then i just said really loudly. CHELSEA. and i was right! that shut him up for abit (: and another question was name a tennis player who has won 13 grandslams. and what did the team on stage say? maria sharapova. like. HUH. seriously. where did your brains go? that guy evidently only watches women's tennis haha. the answer is federer by the way. and he's just one of the many. i'm so proud of myself! and i knew about the monaco royal wedding while most people didn't! that come's from reading vogue. HAH. who said vogue was frivolous? (: but oh well. we lost in the end, so what's the use if i can answer all the other questions right?
there was this KI team participating and eugene said:
The KI people will be too busy pondering if the question exists to press the buzzer and answer the question! but look who won in the end :O
life's such a loser sometimes isn't she?
ps: in case the finalists need to know the answer to the definition of irony, it's something that's made out of iron. not fully iron, but mostly iron. that's irony for you.
hello goodbye; 3:41 PM
Thursday, August 4, 2011
UNBEATABLE- BLOW YOUR MIND
CONGRATS TO MY FAVOURITE BOYS ON YOUR SUCCESSFUL RETURN (: you guys have done it again, outdoing yourself with every new album! it's been an amazing journey with y'all since sorry sorry. and you've been one of my greatest sources of joy when i've got no one else to turn to. all the best for promotions! love you much.
Super junior never fails to amaze me! the MV turned out way better than expected, and everyone looks simply stunning. i know. i'm such a fangirl. but i can't help it! even shindong and kyuhyun look great. (cyn! happy now?) I must admit the dance isn't going to be as iconic as sorry sorry but it's still pretty amazing! i always believe that music and MVs have come together (ever since i listened to bonamana before the MV came out and totally didn't get anything from it haha) so i've waited till now to post the song! heh. i did listen to it the moment it came out, though. like on the radio at 12 plus am. my favourite DJ's the best hahah.
the whole MV leaves me breathless, it's scary. IMO, hyuk looks the best here! (sorry teukie!) followed by ryeowook and leeteuk. i'm biased towards blond hair heh. but the three of them are the sexiest and that's pretty much undeniable. (:
spotted a bit of shuffling, bboy, and a huge lot of nonsense dance in there. the whole mish-mash is pretty cool though! i'm glad SJ doesn't do it like 2pm, which puts one dance style in the entire MV (shuffling for i'll be back etc) so it's more interesting! i could go on and on about the MV, but i think i'll wait for their comeback stage.
meanwhile, life's been a drag. and stuff happened which i won't state here. but i guess i'm coping? it's like a rollercoaster. i've been keeping track on the general feel i get this week and it's been:
monday: low
tuesday: high
wednesday: low
thursday: high
who knows what tomorrow's gonna bring.
Two local bands, 53A and sixx came to school yesterday on the school invasion tour! both were great and the rapper from sixx is simply amazing. abigail and i were swooning cause his skills are out of the roof hehe. rapper wannabes who can do love the way you lie have greater dreams (: but it was so weird cause the leads and all were so high with all the headbanging and dancing and jumping and all the muggertoads were uh. mugging. ok not mugging but cold and stony. then some high kids (oh, the typical group. why am i not surprised?) decided to rock out and a couple of others thought it would be cool to join them. but if you're not cool and you try to join the cool you end up weird, right? so that was what it was like. weird. the energy level was high, yes. but NJ is weird. fullstop. apparently they're supposed to be giving away macbeth footwear to lucky winners but i don't see the link that's supposed to be up on fb/53A's site ):
arm wrestled with chin and yujie today! i can't remember what prompted our stupidity, but i think it was because chin wanted to seem strong and win me haha. played exhibition matches with the tow of them. i call them exhibition matches because my win and their loss was all staged and fake haha. though i was a little annoyed cause i was expecting them to play properly ): but gentlemen always let the girl have their way, no? kids.
hello goodbye; 9:03 PM
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
reflect
i was actually waiting for the mr simple mv to come out! but uh it's not out ): maybe i got the date wrong? it can't be. maybe tonight. midnight. i remember distinctly it was supposed to be august third! where is it ): i checked the sm youtube account and it's not there yet. ah wells. maybe i'll check again tomorrow. meanwhile, i finally found the mv of is this all be vanness wu. he's the greatest ever. the lyrics are. well. making me think. kinda. and yenjue's good too. at least i can understand what they're singing haha. abigail usually disses me for listening to trash i can't understand in kpop. but hey, there's always the translated version of the lyrics, no?
there are some things that i think i won't be able to take much longer. it's awkward and really really weird. girl, you're freaking screwing up my life. know that. wtf i'm actually jealous. i'm not supposed to be jealous! it's not an emotion that's in my dictionary. especially when it comes to these things. gosh and you know. it really freaks me out. knowing how much i've told you before, i really don't know how much of the stuff's gonna leak out. well, if i ever find out shit. well, eff you.
see the shuriken? yepp. and hangeng's back (:
hello goodbye; 6:15 PM
Monday, August 1, 2011
MR SIMPLE
TOTALLY HYPED NOW. it doesn't seem as bad as i expected. the music sounds blue-sy! i wonder if their title track will be like that too. heh. but usually title tracks are heavy. while blues aren't exactly heavy.. in kpop terms.
OH WAIT. cynthia unnie just alerted me on the second teaser! looks like it won't be blue-sy after all! definitely gonna be a dance tune. but as to what kind, i think it'll be a little on the beast side. the techno-emo stuff like fiction hehe just love that kind of music. but i won't keep guessing what the album's going to be like cause the real thing might just blow my mind away (: oh wells! 2 more days, elfs! (: the hottest kids on the block are coming right back. can't wait!
